Sunday, January 30, 2011

Soak

It is funny what we “soak” in or choose to “soak” in. It is also funny that we use the word soak in that phrase.


When I was a kid, I would visit my grandparent’s house in western Idaho. Sometimes I would be there when my Grandfather would siphon water from the ditch and flood the yard. This was a way of irrigating the lawn.

The water would be inches deep and slowly the water would soak into the ground. I loved splashing around in his wateryard.

This soaking process is very effective. In one fell swoop the grass in the entire yard is given a drink. Soaking is a process. It saturates the area with so much water that the ground has no choice but to accept it.

It is funny what we “soak” in.

In life, there is a soaking process. It, unlike water, is a saturation of thoughts or ideas upon our minds and hearts, and eventually those thoughts or ideas begin to sink in. These saturates can either be good or bad for us. I guess it depends upon what we are being “soaked” with.

What is “soaking” you?

Thursday, January 20, 2011

The Middle of In Between

In my excitement to start a new journey in life, I forgot one thing. I forgot the “desert” principle. At least it is a principle for me. I have seen it throughout my life, especially when change happens.


This “desert” is a point of time between two significant moments or events. The purpose of the “desert” is reflection, re-training, re-focusing in preparation for the new that is to occur. One can or cannot be aware that these three things are happening, but they are. Any time there is change and important change, there also needs to be this time to cope, understand, or just give direction to the upcoming. Here is an example.

Moses spent forty years in Egypt. It was during that time he was part of the royal family by adoption. Then there was his sudden escape and the subsequent forty years in Midian as a shepherd. There was his encounter with the burning bush and for forty more years he led the people of Israel out from bondage and to the edge of the Promised Land. It was Moses’ shepherd years that was his “desert” principle. It is unclear if he knew at that time God was forming him to be a leader. I can imagine that he wondered about his royal years and all of the perks and benefits that had come with that lifestyle.

It has been said that in life, one can either look backward or look forward. Looking backward would be the missing of the old, the regrets of mistakes, or having the comfortability of the known. Looking forward is the anticipation of the new, the hope of the future, or the struggle of the ensuing battle. But sometimes, great discovery can be found, not in the past or the future, but in the now.

We need “desert’ times to rest from something and get ready for something else. We need to rethink certain actions and decisions and sometime re-train ourselves in order to have success in our new endeavors. We need to re-focus our thoughts and dreams so they can be achieved. Or at least I do.

So, I have been in this “desert” period. This lull is supposed to shape me or make me aware of things. So what have I done during his time? And what have I learned through this?

I have learned that I will need to be moved far out of my comfort zone to accomplish things, whatever they may be. I have learned that just because I have always believed that great things are just around the corner, they may not be. I have waited for all of my life to feel like I have made it or arrived, only to find there is one more corner. Maybe greatness, maybe that feeling that I am special, is not going to happen. Maybe no matter how I plan, strategize or goal set, nothing is going to come of it. Maybe I am, after all, just average.

Reading a biography of a man who, determined that a higher will was more important than right or wrong, gave his life and came into a close submission to God, made me wonder if that is achievable for me. Once again, there is this realization that it is not about me. There is a far greater thing than my personal success or feelings. Sometimes, you have to make a stand, to let your voice be heard, to care and act.

Sometimes the grass is greener. Sometimes it is not. But it is still green. Even in the desert.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Report card

It has been six months since I quit my job. Again, the reasoning was four-fold. I wanted to get out of off price retail management for a while. I wanted to spend more time with my family. I wanted to pursue some sort of business. And finally, but by no means the least, I wanted to trust God for daily needs.


So, here is how it is going. A person looking from the outside at my situation would probably score me a fail. That would be in a pass/fail system as well as the graded system. And even if they graded me on a curve the score would be an F.

I am going to give me a C-, or slightly below average. I believe two of the four things are being accomplished. It is true that I am not working in off price retail at the moment. It is true that I am spending more time with my family. Sometimes the together time is mixed in with activities of and with others. It feels like we are always doing something and have different obligations. There have been funerals, weddings, baby showers, doctor’s visits, meetings, and sundry other things. Not bad, but busy. We have had our evenings together and that is a great thing. Working retail requires have the late shift during the week. So, by the time I would arrive at home, my boy was in bed and my wife was winding down. I still needed some time to strip off work mentality and put on home mentality.

The pursuit of a business has not materialized. I have done some prep work, but overall there hasn’t been much motivation for that. I think I am doing well as a “house husband”, and that could be debatable, but there isn’t the time I thought I would have to invest in a business creation.

And then there is the trusting God part. It sounds so great and confident as I audibly explain it to friends and family. Every time I talk about the process, I get excited and a burst of determination kicks in and off I go. But I still worry about unexpected expenses and the timeline when all of our reserve money is depleted. Getting the car fixed, a doctor visit, a leak in the house either takes some money or prepares to take some money.

God, however, has been good. We, by no means, have gone without. But part of the trust issue is this: when a crisis occurs or circumstances change will we still have the same attitude and confidence that we are being looked after? It is fine as long as things go according to “schedule”, but when we notice a chink in our armor, will we still stand strong?

So, six months in, and what do I have to show for it? That I cannot answer. I do have perfect attendance and a C- for the course.

Friday, January 14, 2011

The Alley

We spent the holidays at my wife’s parents. They live in a small town in Eastern Washington. There may be 20,000 people in the surrounding area. Across the river in another state is its sister city of about 30,000.


We were there on a Sunday, so we went with them to the church they attend to worship. I did not drive there, as I am two things. One, I am a hopeless romantic. That does not apply here. Two, I get lost easily. Only because I don’t know where I am. So, I was a passenger. And that is fine with me. It gives me opportunity to observe. And driving to the church building, here is what I observed.

Getting closer and closer to our destination I realized that we were passing church building after church building. And they all looked similar. All, it seemed, were painted white. They were all older in style. Some were wood, some stucco, and others concrete. So, within a four square block area, from 8th to 12th and Chestnut to Elm, I counted eight churches. And all were having services at the same time. I call it “Church Alley”

These churches were different denominations. We passed by a Presbyterian church, a Catholic church, a Reformed church, and a Church of God. Then it was a Christian church, a Wesleyan, and a Missionary Baptist church. Our destination was a Southern Baptist church.

A hand painted church sign with the words “renovation in progress” on it along with the name of the church and a smaller sign saying that they were meeting in the basement greeted us. There had been water damage to the building and the sanctuary was still being remodeled. There were sheets of plywood covering doors and parts of the outside walls. If you didn’t know it, it would appear as if it were empty.

On the backside of the church we pull into a small gravel parking lot and go down the outside concrete stairs the basement where the service will be. As I said, you could easily drive by and not even know it was having Sunday services.

Down in the basement, like the catacombs of old, there we were, twenty-four people. To have a worship service. The style of service was not my preference. But that did not matter. What does matter is that we all have the same unconditional love from God, and through the sacrifice the same forgiveness. We are siblings through grace.

And so there we were with those other churches huddled together in “Church Alley”. Though there may be differences, the grace is still the same. I had wished that they, the church buildings, were more spread out around the town to influence a wider area. But then I was painted a picture of different people from different denominations driving or walking to “Church Alley” to gather to worship. Somehow things were put into perspective.

Within that four square block area and inside eight different churches, all were giving honor to the same God. And collectively the hearts, prayers, and songs were making their way up. It was like each building was a room of a larger house. I guess there are “many rooms”.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Sorry

Sorry for the hiatus.  I've been sick.  But now, ready to roll.  Well, ready to write.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Christmas Past

My son is not materialistic. At least, not yet. This Christmas was his third. His first Christmas was in 2008 and he was nine months old. Obviously, he didn’t understand much and we pretty much opened his presents for him. A year later in 2009, he was a year and nine months. And it was more or less the same scenario. He had received a lot of presents and we decided we wouldn’t give him one and save it for next year. It was a book on automobiles. And since it was still a little old for him, we stored it away, fully wrapped, in our gift-giving box. That is the one where we have purchased items and when the need arises, we have a gift.


So this year, as we were preparing for Christmas, we knew that our son already had one gift. And this Christmas would be fun, as he would have the base concept of opening presents and giving them to the proper recipients.

We got him some more books. He really likes books. He can sit for twenty or so minutes just observing the pictures on the pages. It has sort of become a ritual in the morning that after he wakes up, he wants to stay in his crib bed and “read” four or five books before signaling he is ready for the day. That signal is a loud and determined “UP”.

This year, Christmas 2010, was spent at the grandparent’s house. Our son had a really good time. Some of his adventures included turning the light switches on and off, jingling the Christmas bells that were hanging on the doorknobs, opening and closing the doors, you know, the good stuff. I think his favorite pastime was running down the hall and yelling. Nana and Papa would act startled and they would all laugh and laugh. Some things never get old.

Christmas morning, I get my son up and he runs down the hall to the front room. It is there that he sees a present on the table by the tree. He looks at it and then bangs on it like a drum. Ironically, the present was for him and it was a drum. My boy is brilliant. From there on out, he was not so interested in opening more presents and the family ended up opening most of his. He just likes to play. He was most excited by the crinkly gift confetti and the red tinsel that came in gift bags. He also enjoyed the tubes from paper towel rolls.

Turns out, he still has that automobile book wrapped and ready for next year. A water bottle and a baseball mitt now join the book. Maybe next year.

For now, he isn’t caught up with the quantity of gifts and the selfishness that can come with them. It is nice to see. Wish I could be content with a paper towel roll.