Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Struggles

So here I sit and am trying to work on my sermon for this week and I am really struggling. . .  This is how I am going to introduce my sermon on Sunday, and yes I am struggling.  And the irony of it has not gone unnoticed as the message is on Romans 7 about Paul’s struggles.

I want to present the issue, not in an expository fashion, and not in a doctrinal fashion, but in a practical fashion.  Because in reality, it is how we live out what we believe that makes what we believe believable. 

There are some Christians who know a lot when it comes to verses of the Bible, and doctrines, and muse deep in theology.  And on the outset, one would make the assumption that because of that knowledge they life and lifestyle would be “rock” solid.  But as it turns out, I got a completely different realization of how young in the faith these pillars really are with some seemingly insignificant issues. And it has taken me aback a bit. 

And then I visited with a family who are the sweetest, most loving people, living out their exemplary faith so spot on, I am a bit envious.  And then we started talking doctrine, and wow, there were some “out in left field” beliefs.  And these were the basics that all believers, even young ones, should have a grasp in, even if only a simple understanding.

Which brings me to my struggle.  I recognize that I am not a saint, in the I’ve got life and doctrine and holiness all figured out, and I also recognize that people are people and we’re not perfect, but still it makes me wonder if we are getting it.

Are my remarks, the studies I have been leading, the sermons that I have preached, merely words that people hear and then file in the brain, but they never find their way into application and practice into daily living?  Knowledge is fine, and understanding is good, but if it doesn’t change our lifestyle and grow us to be more like Him, then it seems our speaking is in vain.

But in some, I have seen change.  Many are serving and doing in a manner that has warmed my heart.  They are actively growing and are sharing their faith with friends and with the community.  And the conversations that we have had have been encouraging and refreshing as well. And we, I hope, are becoming good friends.

Not only am I struggling to put into words a message that helps us live out that which we know, but I as well wonder how far I have come since this grand experiment of simply trusting God and not man for my needs started some two and a half years ago.

In every way he has been true to His promise of provision.  We have never missed a bill payment or a meal(although it wouldn’t hurt if we skipped some desserts now and then). And when decisions needed to be made, He certainly provided seamless answers.  With all of that, one would think that I was just coasting with this faith thing right into glory. 

But when you submit to Him for meeting daily needs, He does just that.  He meets them daily.  Just enough.  Sometimes I wish it were more.  I wish we were in a better position to save some money for a rainy day, which happens a lot here.  But that wasn’t the promise.  No, the key word in the promise is “daily”.  By the way, my wife, being an English major, really hates it when I use quotation marks. 

So, daily I must trust, daily I must seek, daily I must rest, and daily I must place my hope in the Ancient of Days. He has seen us through me quitting my job. He has seen us through my wife getting a job.  He has seen us through me accepting the call to pastor.  He has seen us through my wife quitting her job.  He has seen us through our life in the “yellow house”, in the “blue house” and in the “gray house”, as my son calls them.

He has seen us through leaving a church we love for another church we have come to love.  He has seen us through leaving old friends for but a season and He has seen us through the making of new friends for hopefully a lifetime. 

So I struggle, because I’m human, and yet I still press on and trust that the One who has seen us through will continue.

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